Do you want to make yourself or break yourself ?
Remember there used to be a time when you got too stubborn on having something that kids in your friend circle had just to avoid the feeling of being left out? Be it those fancy pencil boxes with magnets, be it having certain watches or bicycles or even mobile phones, all of us have, at some point in time been affected by this. We currently think this to be our childish behavior, but if we just give it a closer look, was is just childishness or was that peer pressure?
What's Peer Pressure ???
‘Peer Pressure’ – are just two words but they affect us a lot, both positively & negatively. Most of us might be familiar to these words but let’s just try to get some more clarity on the same. Our peers form the group of people we hang around with and like to be in their company. And when they try to influence your behavior either knowingly or unknowingly, it is known as peer pressure. Here, they generally influence others to behave like them & have similar likes, dislikes, choices, interests etc. It’s like if one doesn’t have these similarities, then others tend to make that person feel low about himself/herself & even try to isolate him/her. Also, many times this pressure becomes internal cause one wants to fit-in a certain group or doesn’t want to feel left out in his/her group. This starts around the age of adolescence which is the age of drastic change in hormones, developing brains & emerging identities and ultimately makes an individual too vulnerable to the influence of peer pressure. In this stage of life, friend groups have the utmost importance & our decisions are mainly those choices that enables an individual to fit in.
We humans are social animals and we always tend be in groups because that makes us feel nice as we get interact & share our thoughts and even receive opinions. Moreover, it makes one feel secured which is the most likable factor. Hence, when there is a group there would be pressure. Thus, peer pressure exists in all age groups. Sometimes this pressure is desirable as it doesn’t let a person to go against certain norms & ensure his safety and also many a times motivate a person to work on his/her capabilities and outperform himself/herself. But pros & cons go hand in hand. Negative peer pressure exerts so much mental pressure that someone who isn’t that strong mentally tends to ruin himself/herself and it takes a lot of years for the person to get back to his/her normal life. Sometimes the damage might leave a lasting mark too.
Both sides of the coin !
Let’s give it a positive start. There are some good things that this social pressure brings to the teens. Seeing your peers performing well academically, one tends to try to perform well so that he/she too can feel oneself as a part of the group. Similarly, this holds true for leadership & volunteering qualities. You admire these peers of yours as you feel that they have an amazing personality & you too start willing for one. You even want to participate in extra-curricular activities cause your peers are into it and you don’t want to feel completely out-of-place when they would be having discussions related to those activities. Hence, it builds the competitiveness in an individual which seems to be healthy as it helps one to build on one-self by inculcating some good qualities & improving on self-confidence. Positive peer pressure makes a person come out as a desirable & better person in the long-run.
But then there are many negative effects too. Negative peer pressure motivates one wrongly to go ahead in a wrong way. Just because your peers are skipping lectures, you too might do so in order to prove yourself as cool & chilled out. Similar thoughts of being cool pushes one to use alcohol, drugs, cigarettes & other narcotics. One even indulges into the practice of stealing in order to buy things that would enhance his/her image in front of his/her peers. Overall, it won’t be incorrect to say that negative peer pressure affects mental health by decreasing self-confidence and academic performance. Many a times they distance away from their family members & fall prey to depression & anxiety and if this isn’t looked into then the individuals can get into self-harm or suicidal thoughts.
Role of Parents is too crucial
Peer pressure’s negative issues isn’t something that cannot be corrected. There are possible measures that can be taken:
1. Parents should try to build an open-communication environment so that they would be able to know what’s going in their child’s life as an open environment makes it easier for the adolescents to talk freely & discuss his/her problems.
2. Parents should try to act as a friend & should avoid being too strict. They can even share their adolescent experiences & try to empathize to them.
3. Parents should try to adopt an assertive manner & that’s how the children too would learn this and also would understand to avoid certain things subtly.
4. Parents should motivate their kids to build positive relationships & choose their friends wisely.
5. Even if the child makes mistakes, the first & best fit approach would be to make the understand & to understand them rather than just scolding them. The main motive should be to make them realize so that they don’t commit those mistakes in future.
Teenage & adolescence is the best phase of life as it is full of life lessons. This phase has the capability to either make or break your entire future. The choice of path is yours.